The Matriarch

She is the head of the family. The leader, the one who keeps it all together, she is fierce and strong, loyal and protective, honour, leadership and love ooze through every essence of her being. The sacrifices she makes. She is adored and loved, worshipped. 

I  think about my darling mom. Growing up she was a tiger mom, I think that is very common in immigrant women. They fight even harder for al the things they didnt have - for you - they do know better but they have often come from poor, religious, status sensitive cultures and countries and so they are hard. Demanding. unwavering. I am a grown ass woman - I feel like a little girl. I am completely overwhelmed in life and my life on paper is horrific. But, I am resilient because it was beaten into me. Independence, perseverance, dominance. It's from the head of the family and while my dad was Super Dad and an incredible man. It was my mother who held everything together. 

The lesson of love to pass on here through this piece is - to let those around you look after you too. My darling mother, the once strong, fierce protective Lioness is now a shell of her former self. Dementia. The harder your life, the harder you fight the more toll it takes. She would never let anyone help her. I really struggle with that too. She was always the one being responsible, making things happen, doing everything for everyone else and always putting herself last. 

Matriarchs need loving and worshiping and looking after too. They are incredibly strong women. Natural born leaders. They make the weak look like dissolved grains of salt. The stand firm. They are what this world needs. But they are still only human, despite probably deserving the biggest superwoman capes available because family is family and without them - where would any of us be? They are the lighthouse, the beacon when we are lost at sea. And I am lost at sea - but so now is my beacon. 

It is a heartbreaking lesson to live but one we should al take heed of.